A Serious Situation

The following is a true story.

I’ll do my best to stay calm, but I must warn you, I am anything but calm.

Back in August while looking for a white-wall version of Lightning McQueen (because no other version would do that day) I lost my finger in a hole in our couch cushion. Over the past seven years, our living room furniture no doubt had seen its share of pee, puke and slobber. Still, I was shocked to find holes on the underside and sides of the cushions.

The decision to purchase new furniture sent me into a shopping frenzy and started a chain of events that, as of this writing is on-going.

After weeks of hard-core couch shopping, I found a couch that I just knew would look perfect in our “country” living room. I searched through books and books of fabric samples looking for the one fabric that would stop me in my tracks signalling it was the one for our new couch.

I usually love to shop, but when I keep banging my head against a wall can’t find what I’m looking for, I become frustrated and aggravated. You see, in my head (which is a busy, busy place mind you) I know what I want, which is shocking because HAVE YOU MET ME? As you might imagine, it is tough being me sometimes. 

In the middle of the madness, I found a fabric that I fell in love with. It was a yellow, blue and white stripe and I. loved. it. My intensive search also resulted in my running across a cute accent rocking chair that I could not get out of my head. And when I say I couldn’t get it out of my head, I mean that I set out on a wild goose chase.  I scoured the internet looking for it. I called furniture company warehouses and I shopped EVERY furniture store within a fifty-mile vicinity. Several companies carried the Craftmaster brand of furniture and could order the chair, but none offered it for less than $700. And I just couldn’t see paying that much for a rocking chair.

Even I have my limits. 

In the meantime, I returned home and made a visit to the dot com furniture website. I was happy to find an online-catalog that allowed me to plug my fabric choice into the couch style to see exactly what it would look like.

I had taken a seat on the happy train until I saw this:

The happy train I was on came to a screeching halt because I was overwhelmed by all the stripes. I took a second look and wondered if it would be as over-the-top in my living room as it looked on my computer screen.

My heart sank and I knew that I had created a monster. A striped Craftmaster monster.

I quickly scrapped that idea and couldn’t help but wonder how the fabric pattern would look on that cute little accent rocking chair.  I found the chair on their site (in a hideous pattern might I add!) and started to design the chair online.

This is my chair.

Oh sweet mercy, LOOK HOW CUTE.

My mind was made up and the search was on.

I posted the picture on the Facebook (because that’s what everybody does when they find a cute chair they HAVE TO HAVE) and I was on a mission to find that stinkin’ chair cheaper than $650. Minutes later, a teacher at Stevie’s school suggested I call a little furniture store in Kentucky just a few hours from where we live. I called the company the next day and then called McDaddy with my OH MY WORD I’M SO EXCITED THE CHAIR IS CHEAPER AND CAN BE ORDERED OVER THE PHONE AND OH MY WORD I AM SO EXCITED voice.

To which he replied calmly, “Order the chair.”

THAT was on October 11th.

The same date the store clerk told me it would take 6-8 weeks for the chair to be delivered.

And this is where I could go off on a tangent and tell you how my mind started racing about matching pillows and curtains and wow, I wonder if I can order some extra fabric, but I’ve already told THAT story long, windy tale, so I won’t go into it again.

You’re welcome.

Six weeks later I called the furniture store to check on my chair.

“We’re expecting it any day and we’ll call  you when it gets here.”

One week later, I called the furniture store to check on my chair.

“Uh, it’s not here yet, but we’re expecting it any day. You don’t have to call us though, we’ll call you when it gets here.”

One week later, I called the furniture store to check on my chair.

“It’s only been 7 weeks and 3 days. It should be here next week.”

After hanging up the phone, I did some quick calculating and realized that in fact it had been 8 weeks and 3 days, but I let it go because I was so darn excited.

And because there was always the possibility that my calculations were inaccurate.

Then, the Christmas season was upon us and suddenly I forgot about my chair for one whole week.

On December 21st, I called the company (AGAIN!) to check on my chair. It had been 10 weeks and I was a wee bit aggravated that I STILL DIDN’T HAVE THE CHAIR.

After pretty much insisting that someone, anyone, check on my chair, the owner of the place agreed to place a call to the factory. When I didn’t hear from him in a reasonable amount of time, I called the owner again.

“Craftmaster shipped the chair on November 17th. I have no idea where the chair is. For all I know it could be on a truck headed to Oklahoma, but I’m gonna track it down.”

For those of you who I lost 680 words ago, I’ll just break it down for you.

My cute striped rocking chair had been touring the US for five weeks in the back of a Sunbelt 18-wheeler freight truck.

In the words of Ralphie Parker, “A fuse blew and l had gone out of my skull.”

Folks, I cannot tell you the hit my blood pressure took at that precise moment.

As it turns out, the owner of the company admits that he should have called the factory oh, I don’t know, one of the seventeen times I called checking on the chair weeks before. Still, he was not able to tell me where in the heck my chair was.

Within hours, my chair was located on a truck and I was told it would be delivered to the furniture store the next week.

Fast forward to last Thursday.

McDaddy took a call from the furniture store owner and was told that the chair had been delivered. He was also told that one of the wood rockers was cracked, and that the rocker itself would be ordered and shipped out ASAP.

SO.

Here I sit, twelve weeks later AND STILL NO CHAIR.

So, basically it took me 1,085 words to tell you that I learned that an estimated delivery time means absolutely nothing. Especially if it is coming from a furniture store owner a few hours away from my house in Kentucky.

But I’m not bitter. NOT. ONE. BIT.

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What did YOU learn this week?

You can read the long detailed version of rules here, or follow these easy steps.

1. Any time this week, publish your What I Learned This Week post on your blog. AND, if you could, spread the word to your bloggy friends so more people will LINK UP for pete’s sake.

2. Within that post, please mention the What I Learned This Week carnival and link to this post here at From Inmates To Playdates.

3. Then link up with the Mr. Linky below and give a shout out about it on facebook or twitter.

4. Visit the other participants and see what they learned this week. Then leave a comment because comments are fun!

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