From Inmates to Playdates

Posts Tagged ‘Olympics’

Each week I try to come up with something creative and intriguing for Thursday Thirteen and each week I wonder if I’m hitting the mark. While I have a whole list of Thursday Thirteen ideas to choose from, the fact is, I’m not in the mood for any of them. It’s been a difficult day and my nerves are shot, so I’ll keep this short and sweet.

Remember last week when I mentioned that me and my van had some sort of disagreement on the big honkin’ hill?

Well.

While driving home today (at a high rate of speed on the interstate mind you) the van and its gas pedal decided it might be fun to play a trick on this ole’ gal and it got hung up somewhere between 68-70 mph.

Shut Up.

I’ll give you a minute to re-read that sentence to make sure you read it correctly.

Yes. You. Did.

Two words for you.

Scared. Todeath.

The cruise control was set at 70 mph and I had just hung up with McDaddy who was headed home from his second home Pennsylvania where he was been working 3-4 days each week for the better part of 2010 when I tapped the brake to disengage the cruise and change lanes.

Only the cruise did not disengage and the van did not slow down even though my foot was attempting the shove the brake through the floor board.

Within seconds I became keenly aware of every vehicle around me. I assessed how much room I had to get stopped, how close the vehicle behind me was and the fact that ten seconds or so later the van was still not slowing down.

Quickly I ran through my short list of options, which included, throwing it into park, throwing it into neutral, and freaking out. I can tell you that freaking out seemed like the easiest option. Which is exactly what I did shortly after getting into the emergency lane and throwing the gear shift into neutral.

The conversation with McDaddy on my beloved iPhone went something like this.

ME (WITH HEART RACING): Hey, the brakes on the van went out and I’m sitting on the side of the interstate in the emergency lane.

MCDADDY: Did the brakes go all the way to the floor? Is the cruise control still on? Is the van in park? Did the idiot lights come on? Can you drive it at all?

ME: Um, I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know and I don’t want to at all because ITS NOT SAFE AND I MIGHT DIE!

MCDADDY: We’ll its obviously time to trade that thing in on a Jeep.

ME: Um, okay. As long as it runs.

MCDADDY: Keep your foot on the brake and start it up.

The engine ran as if it were still going 70 mph.

MCDADDDY: Keep your foot on the brake and push the gas pedal.

The engine returned to normal and I watched the tachometer (or whatever its called) decrease from 3 to 1.\

It is worth mentioning that a situation such as this would not have been a challenge for McDaddy. He possesses the wherewithall to take charge of emergency situations and make quick decisions. I, on the other hand, require a list, a sharpie, a calendar, and at least a 24-hour notice.

This was seriously one of the scaredest (yes, its a word!) events in my life and no, before you ask, I do not drive a Toyota.

I am happy to report that the van is now tucked safely away in the garage and as is always the case in a situation like this, the thing ran perfectly normal for McDaddy as he brought the hunk of junk thing home.

So, with that being said, I do hope you’ll excuse the fact that I am walking down Random Road tonight.

1. One of my favorite iPhone APPS is Words With Friends. It’s a Scrabble type game and if you are a member of the iCult, er, I mean iClub, you can do a search for JulieWV and we can get a game started. Oh, and if you’re looking for about 72 points, play the word Jeep on the triple letter, triple word spaces. YeeHaw!

2. My heart is heavy for my BFF, Becky and her family, who lost their aunt earlier in the week. Death is so stinkin’ tough. Cancer, you suck!

3. While I really love watching American Idol, I do not have a clear favorite this season. I like Big Mike and I think Crystal Bowersox rocked it out tonight!

4. My McDaddy is the original McDaddy. 

Just sayin.

5. While she would not have been my first choice based on her lack of musical experience, Ellen is doing a pretty good job as Judge #4 on Idol.

6. And speaking of crazy words, I learned a new one today – encopresis.

I’ll give you a second to look that up. Never heard of it before but saw it on the Facebook and did what I do when I’m on the hunt for something. *coughgooglecough*

7. Apolo Ohno will be on Jay Leno tonight. I will have to DVR it because sadly I’ve spent one too many late nights in front of the TiVo watching my boyfriend Apolo Ohno go for the gold, which he looks good in by the way.

Well, he does!

8. Some girlfriends are coming over tonight to decorate my newly remodeled basement walls. I have purchased some really great stuff but have no idea how to make it all work and pull it all together. So, weather permitting, I might have some pictures to show you very soon! (Hi, Susan!)

9. At this very minute, McDaddy is sitting on the couch with his laptop looking at used cars on the internet because that’s what he does at the first hint of a car situation. He’s found a copper colored Mazda 6 that is a six-speed. Oh, and it is a front wheel drive that will “do just as good as your van if not better on the big, honkin’ hill!”

Can you say Saturn Sky?

10. This post is at 1,011 words, so much for short and sweet.

11. My nephew, Isaac Cade is 2 years old today (as of this writing on Wednesday). Happy birthday, buddy!

12. The random isn’t flowing as easy I thought it would. Of course American Idol and Words With Friends are battling with the randomness, but still.

13. More snow today, are you kidding me? Enough already!

I hate to end things on such a cold note, but, that’s just the way the random rolls, I suppose.

Care to share something random today?

This cat is so cute talented. What an exciting night!

As always, I have a long random list of things I’ve learned. Funny thing is that unless I write them down or note them on the iPhone notepad, I often have trouble remembering what they are. Especially if I’m hopped up on chocolate and Olympic viewing.

Most of the uniforms (costumes?) worn in the Olympics could double as body spanx.

The Skeleton is like a train wreck ready to happen a wild and crazy sport and I enjoy watching it.

I am a huge fan of ice skating, however, the Ice Dance Compulsories had me thinking my time could be better spent cleaning a toilet.

The Free Dance however is a different story.

Just because your four-year-old will not recite his Pioneer Club memory verses for you, you should not assume that it’s because he doesn’t know them.

Unless you have a lot of random time on your hands, you probably should not download (?) the Words With Friends app on your iPhone. Oh, and if you do get the Words With Friends APP you might as well go ahead and get the Lexeme APP.

It really bothers me when United States Olympic Atheletes do not put their hand over their heart during The Star Spangled Banner. And each time it happens, I am more bothered by it. Do something with those funky green flowers and show some respect folks.

I love give-aways! In fact, I’m hosting one today over on my Review Page - go have a look!

IHOP has some really good pancakes which stands to reason because they are the International House of Pancakes. It’s just that I only recently ordered pancakes there and discovered the big warm blob of butter sitting atop the stack. I can’t be sure but I think the warm butter makes the pancakes better than normal pancakes.

[NOTE TO SELF: Purchase real butter at the grocery store for your next pancake breakfast extravaganza]

#ff over at Twitter means Follow Friday. I had people on Twitter #ff’n me and I had no idea what it meant. Reluctantly, I came up with some things in my head and then remembered that my friend Google would surely know. Granted, it would have been much easier to ask the Twitter Tweeps about it, however, I feared it was something I wouldn’t want attention drawn to.

Thanks, Google.

Seeing the new Thesis Theme pop up all over the blogosphere makes me wish I had the sense to change my own theme.

And speaking of the new Thesis Theme, pop over to Musings Of A Housewife to see the new theme and to visit other What I Learned This Week posts.

I don’t know about you, but in my humble opinion, the Olympics are addictive. It is so easy to get caught up in Apolo Ohno’s latest short track event or the wild and crazy fearless few that compete in the skeleton.

Seriously, competing in that sport would take some ginormous nerve. At what point in one’s life does one say, “Why yes, I think I might run real fast beside this sled and then jump on it and see how fast I can go!…. Head first!”

It most definitely wasn’t me who has stayed up way too late partying with Bob Costas every single night of the Olympics the past week because I couldn’t care less about Apolo Ohno and his beloved headband. Or Bode Miller. Or Shaun White. I couldn’t stay up way late because its not as if I have absolutely no responsibility and am not required to get up at O Dark Thirty to get a child to school in the mornings.

Likewise, in an attempt to settle my nerves while watching Lindey Vonn and Julia Mancuso, it wasn’t me who had the hair-brained idea to eat a Snickers Ice Cream Bar well after midnight.

Folks, believe me when I say I knew better.

I did not sit in my big, blue, bloggy chair, chowing down on the awesomeness that is the chocolate, the peanuts, the ice cream and the caramel while whoopin’ and hollerin’ for each and every American Athlete no matter what the event.

An hour or so later, it wasn’t me who found herself wollering around in the bed like a brown bear trying to root out a spot get comfortable and get to sleep.

Nope, not me. No way!

I did not lay there compiling this post in my head trying to keep myself still so that I wouldn’t wake Papa Bear McDaddy knowing full well that I should have pulled myself right up out of bed to get the mess out of my head because of the very real possibility that I wouldn’t remember it three days later.

It also wasn’t me who beamed with pride as Stevie made his way to the front of a crowded room to accept a 2nd Place trophy for the Father/Son Cub-Scout Bake-off on Saturday.

Oh, and there’s no way I let out a big squeal seconds after the announcement because for one, I am much too refined for that, and for two, well, because I am typically quiet and reserved.

Not necessarily in that order.

AHEM!

Way to go fellas! I AM very proud of both of you! Your beach cake was yummy!!!!

For more things that people did not do, (probably because they too are quiet, refined and reserved) head over to MckMama’s place.

As is usually the case, I have learned a great deal of random stuff this week. So, if you’re in the market for random, you have come to the right place my friend.

The only problem is that I have one eye on the 2010 Winter Olympics and one eye on my laptop screen. So, I hope you’ll excuse the fact that I am using the handy-dandy list to compile the stuff I learned.

1. I learned that barbecue ribs (or peas, or strawberry poptarts) is capable of causing heartburn. Really bad heartburn. The likes of which I have not seen since pregnancy. Blech.

And no, that is not a hint of any kind.

I’m just sayin.

In fact, the heartburn has reached a level that has sent me on the search for some tums.

2. A very determined stubborn four-year-old has no qualms climbing on top of a cozy coupe if it makes it possible to retrieve his beloved cowboy boots from the top shelf in his closet.

3. The very fact that my four-year-old is willing to use the cozy coupe as a ladder is proof that perhaps I should prepare myself for a future of possible probable disasters.

4. No matter how careful you are when painting, you will discover paint in places you would never expect weeks after the job is completed.

5. If you forget to add washing detergent to the load of laundry you are washing, the stains will probably not come out.

6. If your four year old is in the mood, you can get some awesome pictures of him.

See.

7. I like the name Kessa better than the name Kaydence, but not as well as the name Kendi. Our niece, Kessa is due any day. The name is growing on me.

8. TweetDeck is a lot better than Echofon. (For those of you not in the iPhone Cult Club, Tweetdeck is an iPhone App for Twitter).

9. When one decides to change her Twitter name from ‘Inmates’ to ‘JulieatInmates‘ she should work out all possible interpretations in her head or else a concerned blog reader might come up with this mess –  ’Juli Eatin Mates’

Dang.

10. Before changing a Twitter username, one should consider the fact that she has no earthly idea how to change the name on her professionally designed Twitter home page.

Double Dang.

11. It bothers me when the outfits (costumes?) of the Olympic Ice Skating Figure Skating pairs do not match.

Yes, Russia. I’m talking about you!

12. NBC has some really clever shows on the horizon (Parenthood, A Minute To Win It, and another one I can’t think of right now!). Likewise, the new show Undercover Boss is a refreshing change in reality TV.

13. When watching the 2010 Olympic Games while doing your weekly What I Learned This Week post, it is likely, your post will be random longer than you expected.

14. Thankfully, expired Tums are better than no Tums.

Okay, I’m done!

Visit Musings Of A Housewife to find out what others have learned this week!

A random list of things I did not do since the last time we met up for Not Me! Monday.

1. When packing for our marriage enrichment seminar this past weekend, I did not forget to pack my pajamas because I made a list and I checked it twice daggonit.

2. I also did not sleep in a sweater because of the forgotten pajamas.

3. I did not discover that I had packed two bottles of deodorant for our weekend.

If you must go naked at night, then you should make sure you smell good. Right?

4. While playing the Newlywed Game at the marriage enrichment seminar, there is no way I blurted out an answer before McDaddy had a chance to give his answer because I always think before I speak and I never get ahead of myself. Ahem!

5. I did not send an e-mail to the jokers at Kelloggs Poptarts inquiring about why in the name of pete they would do away with their frosted chocolate vanilla cream poptarts because I never whine or complain about anything. Especially something as silly as poptarts.

6.  Ohno! I do not have a new boyfriend.

Shh. Don’t tell McDaddy!

7. I do not watch Olympic Figure Skating and dream about being graceful and beautiful on the ice because I am a klutz by nature and me + shoes = disaster. I can only imagine that me + ice skates would = traction. For that reason, I never slide around on our kitchen floor in my sock feet pretending to be a skater because I am a grown woman and that would be goofy.

8. My sweet four-year-old did not ask me what a “baby daddy” is because that is not a term we throw around here at the McResidence. But for the record, McDaddy is a wonderful Baby Daddy.

9. I never stay up way too late most nights searching for frivolous things on the internet because I am way more responsible than that. Nor do I ever contemplate purchasing a personalized novel the frivolous things for myself.

10. I did not just change my user name on Twitter from Inmates to JulieatInmates because I’ve had several people mistakenly assume that I am an ex-inmate, met an inmate and married him, or just really liked inmates.

For more Not Me! posts, click on over to MckMama’s place.

I am a huge fan of the Olympics. Beginning on Friday, February 12, 2010, it is a safe bet, that I will keep a low profile because I will watch every Olympic Event I am able to catch with the help of my beloved TiVo. 

Ski Jumping, Luge, Short Track, Freestyle skiing, Snowboard, Curling, Speed Skating, Snowboard, Bobsleigh, Skeleton (whatever that is!), Freestyle Skiing, short track, and Biathlon.

And yes, I realize I mentioned short track twice. It’s one of my favorite events thanks to this cat!

Along with Ohno, these are some of the things I have to look forward to…

Less sleep

Bonding time with the TiVo

Whoopin’ and Hollerin’

Live blogging

Getting teary eyed during the Star Spangled  Banner

Dan Hicks and his impressive interviews

Buying batteries for the TiVo remote

Night after night of Figure skating

Apolo Anton Ohno

Apolo Anton Ohno’s headband

1/100th of a point wins

Researching this whole Skeleton thing to find out what thats all about

Late nights

Less sleep

Can’t wait for the Olympics and the United States Olympic Team! Go Team USA

Oh, and too bad swimming is not part of the Winter Games because I love Phelpsie!

I’m sitting in my BBB chair watching The View on the DVR, and my mind is full of stuff.

I know y’all are probably sick to death of hearing about the blood pressure, so I’ll do us all a favor and not mention that today. I will say though, that I am seeing a kidney specialist today, so hopefully I’ll at least know if McDaddy needs to offer up a kidney or not.

Thanks for your prayers! I appreciate it so much!

—–

McDaddy’s sister is an Arbonne consultant and when she was visiting West Virginia over Thanksgiving, she was shocked to hear that I do did not use a daily moisturizer. Or a monthly moisturizer for that matter. Because, you know, it never dawned on me that the reason my jaws felt so dry during wintertime was because a I needed a moisturizer. I have two words for you.

BIG & MISTAKE

By the looks of the two inch wrinkle between my eyes, I probably should have began using the moisturizer years ago. And, for the record I am also a fan of their facial masque, concealer, and mineral powder which says a lot because in years past, I bought whatever product was in the prettiest case, or whichever mascara had the big, fat orange tube because orange is my favorite color. Or whatever was on sale, buy-one-get-one-free.

Which proves there is a Science to my madness.

—–

Is it just me, or have the execs at NBC lost their minds?

First Jay has the show. Then Conan. Then Jay gets offered 1/2 hour and Conan gets offered an hour. Jay accepts the half-hour. Conan does not accept the later hour. Conan is out. Jay gets the show back.

Crazy talk, I tell you. For the life of me, I can’t understand why NBC would mess with two top-ranked shows. They should have left well-enough alone.

—–

I am not a sports fan, but I am a huge fan of the Olympics. Especially this cat.

Shh, don’t tell Phelpsie. It will our little secret!

My excitement meter is rising and I’m gearing up for Vancouver 2010.

—–

Dang. Another rerun on Grey’s Anatomy? It seems like every other week, Grey’s and Desperate Housewives show a stinkin’ rerun. Enough already. Or just bring on American Idol and I can be in my DVR glory until May. Oh, and speaking of the DVR I think I’m all in on Survivor this year. I haven’t watched the past three or four seasons because my television viewing was getting out of control and I had to take charge. Something had to go and between Survivor, DWTS, American Idol and Amazing Race – Survivor got the boot. But this season? Its heroes vs. villains which means some of my favorites will be back *coughColbycough*

—–

Remember the post about hair products where I asked  y’all to offer up your best hair product advice? I made a trip to Target and spent about 30 minutes in the hair product aisle with Alex and my iPhone scouring the shelves for the products that y’all suggested. Between 217 questions from Alex about what this spelled and what that was for, I purchased four products – 2 hairsprays and 2 round tubs of styling product. Every morning I feel like a school girl doing an experiment for her science project. I will present the results shortly although if you’re expecting some fancy schmancy colored charts with bullet points, I’m afraid you’ll be disappointed. Statistics is a long lost cousin of the math family and if you’ve spent any time here at all, you know that math is not my strong suit.

I’ve made it this far.

—–

There is snow in our forecast and that makes me sad because I am supposed to spend this evening with the girls. I’m praying that it heads north, or south, or anywhere but here.

And that, as they say, it that.

I do hope you have a lovely weekend.

Only 49 days till we get to see this cat  in action!

I can hardly wait!

It’s Thursday and that means another clever edition of Thursday Thirteen.

It’s time for the Letter O.

Let’s get this thing going.

1. OLIVE GARDEN – One of my favorite restaurants. I ALWAYS order spaghetti with meat sauce. And, I always eat more salad and bread sticks than I should.

2. OCEAN – The McFamily is currently in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. The water is breathtaking.

3. OFFROADING – One of McDaddy’s favorite things to do in his heap (ahem, I mean Jeep).

4. OATMEAL – Brown sugar and cinnamon please, with a piece of toast to dip in it.

5. OUTLAW – As in the Dancing Outlaw. If you have never heard of the Dancing Outlaw, I would suggest you go to YouTube and check him out. He is from wild, wonderful West Virginia. He is definitely wild, but not sure about the wonderful part.

6. OFFICE – The Longaberger Home Office is one of the most unique buildings I have ever seen.

7. OCCUPATION – Before becoming pregnant, I was a correctional counselor in a jail. This was my last day in that capacity. I miss my jail friends.

8. ORTHOGNATHIC SURGERY – Otherwise known as Operation-fix-my-overbite – When I was a senior in high school, I had corrective surgery to fix my overbite. My jaws were broken and wired shut for eight weeks. Sweet mercy, can you believe I survived? The first few days after surgery were tough, but it was worth the pain.

9. OUTBACK – I love to eat at Outback. Unless I’m feeling frisky and try something new I always order Victoria’s Filet. That Victoria sure knows how to make a mean filet. And, I love, love, love the side salad. Their croutons are delightful!

10. OLYMPICS – I am an Olympic junkie. My favorite events are swimming, gymnastics, ice skating, beach volleyball, trampoline, diving, speed skating and bobsledding. I wish they were held every year. Oh, and just in case you hadn’t heard, Michael Phelps is my boyfriend.

11. ORGANIZATION – I am big on organization. Yesterday, I made the mistake of attempting to organize all of the photos in my photobucket account into individual folders. I should have left well enough alone because once you move a photo from its original location on photobucket, the link changes and it leaves a big white “IMAGE HAS BEEN MOVED OR REMOVED FROM PHOTOBUCKET BOX” in the place where the picture was. If you are looking at Vintage Inmates To Playdates and you see the big white stupid box instead of a real picture, please bear with me. It will take me a few days to restore all of my photos into their respective posts. GRRRR….

12. ORANGES – Not worth the mess.

13. ORGAN – I hope to save a life one day. If all else fails, I am an organ donor.